Perspectives of a Lady, Gentleman & Dane

romance Archive

Hannah Sheflyand

I used to find Valentines day to be a drag and disliked the over priced consumerism (flowers double in price overnight)…. but I think I have become pretty romantic over time and now just relish that there is an extra occasion to spend time with loved ones. I hope your weekend goes smoothly whether you are on your own or not. Tonight, Brian and I are joining my parents to head to Brooklyn Fare Chef’s Table (which I am super duper excited about- have you ever been?), but I am also pretty under the weather so I am hoping the rest of the weekend requires no effort and instead lots of cuddle time and hot tea.

Some fun, love filled links from around the web to help keep you cheery this weekend:

A list of movies to binge watch

Easy desserts that are under 100 calories!

Great southern romance stories

Wish one of these cutedog dads would be my valentine

Some extra eye candy ūüėČ

A defense for Valentines day

What are your plans for the weekend?

Hannah Sheflyand

Over the winter holidays I decided to read the 5 Love Languages (men’s version here) and had a little bit of mixed emotions over it.¬†Have you heard about this book and the essential languages of love?

Words of Affirmation

Acts of Service

Receiving Gifts

Physical Touch

Quality Time

The¬†idea is that there¬†are many ways to express love to the other partner but usually each person has a primary love language that needs to be addressed to feel loved. Each person then has a “love tank” that needs to be filled with that love language.¬†¬†It was quick to figure out our primary languages, mine for sure is Quality Time, Brian’s is definitely Physical Touch. Now whenever we have a long day at work and get home we kid around asking whether either Love Tank is full or needs some pumping ūüôā
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Hannah Sheflyand

I can admit that I am awful with DIY projects; I love getting gifts and I love giving gifts, but I have no imagination and have very little patience for creating personal gifts for others. Luckily it is super easy to find amazing ideas and projects for gifts online ūüôā

If I had any artistic skills I would love to work on one of these projects:

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Hannah Sheflyand

Being its the week of romance and love, lets talk about sex… more specifically bdsm and porn.

I was unsure if it would be a proper topic to discuss but I feel bdsm and porn has become less taboo for the everyday couple and that in my opinion is an awesome thing. I remember that going through college sex was an every day topic and no one was ashamed to discuss it at all; everything from hook ups, awkward positions, and silly laughable experiences were discussed over dinner, drinks or unproductive study sessions. Now as time has passed and relationships have become more serious, these conversations have almost come to a stand still. Is it because we feel too mature, too awkward because we know the friends partner, we have learned it all and there is nothing to discuss, or just embarrassment?

There has always been the option of secretly reading erotic romance novels, but once 50 Shades of Grey came out, things have changed. Yes its fake, yes there are many other books and writers that do a better job with writing this genre (some great suggestions here, here & here), but the topic of bdsm has been on New York Times best seller list for over 100 weeks and now will be on the big screen this weekend.

I understand that many feel porn is¬†not proper, as a career for those in it (but don’t forget those who have risen from it such as David Duchovny or Sibel Kekilli)¬†or for those watching it¬†(which lets be honest everyone has at least taken a glance). I think this progress, in the media and through the general public, will help change that or at least get people opening up and keeping discussions going.

New York City is joining in on this new openness on sex and will be having their first ever Porn Film Festival later this month, “committed to bringing the best and most diverse body of work to NYC as a platform for both established and emerging talent.” The premier night will include Miley Cyrus’ short film (a snip below) and Tila Tequila’s sex tape.

How do you feel about this topic? How open are you about your sex life with friends?

Hannah Sheflyand

I hate reality tv…. I am more into watching shows like Boardwalk Empire, House of Cards and Homeland, yet something really draws me to the craziness of the Bachelor/Bachelorette series. I started watching during the Bachelorette season with Ashley Hebert and enjoyed it for all the eye candy plus the cute personality of Ashley. To this day I am definitely more of a fan of the Bachelorette compared to the Bachelor because there is less drama,¬†the guys picked are always so hot and it seems a lot less awkward.

This season of the Bachelor just started last week, is with Chris Soules, the supposedly enormously successful farmer from Iowa (If any readers know, I am really interested, how does a farmer become enormously successful?). He seems like the pretty average midwesterner which means we can expect a lot more craziness from the girls to make up for it and just in the last 2 episodes, it has not disappointed. Brian has even secretly (and almost enjoyingly) started watching with me. Having a second person watch with me has made it more enjoyable, especially because I have someone to joke and gossip¬†with about the girls with the “crazy eyes”, the big boobs and cute personalities. I can almost understand why people¬†throw weekly Bachelor TV viewing parties… almost.

I did find it interesting that many avid watchers have started a fantasy football style game, many do it on their own, but my favorite is The Bachelor Bracket, where the girls you picked and the actions they take gain you points through each episode. I am not part of one these games but think it would be interesting to do in a future season. Are you a Bachelor/ Bachelorette viewer? Have you ever participated in one?

Its too early to really tell much about the girls this season but here are a few of Brian and my favorites that we think will make it to the end.


Britt- the waitress who seems to actually have a conversation without saying like in every sentence or act too ditsy.

430.1x1 (1)

Ashley I- the journalist from north NJ who claims she is a virgin and never had a boyfriend before.

430.1x1 (2)

Kaitlyn- the dance instructor who seems super confident about herself in not a vain way.

430.1x1 (3)

& Kelsey- From Austin, I just like her.

Any junky TV that you are a huge fan of?

Hannah Sheflyand

We had our anniversary over the weekend, neither of us are big romantics and with the holiday season in full swing, we both found it best to stay home, hang out and just enjoy each others company.

Since we also just spent a lot of our money on holidays gifts for each other and for our family and friends we agreed no big gifts and instead something cute, cheap and simple. Brian got me a beautiful bouquet of flowers and a sweet card which was perfect. Being that I could not gift Brian a bouquet of flowers I went searching for a gift that would show how much I appreciate him but still stay on budget.


I got him a bagful of yummy goodies with little messages written on them such as “I am Stuck on you” on the gum, “I am Nuts about you” on the peanut m&ms and “There are a million Reese’s why I love you” on the Reese’s cups. I also filled it with some scratch off cards with “I won the Lotto when I met you” and then some beef jerky and salt taffys just because those are Brian’s favorite goodies. I was afraid over all the whole thing was a little too cheezy but I think he loved it more because of that.

We both ended up enjoying the gift while watching movies all day in bed ūüôā

What do you like doing for special occasions like anniversaries? Do you prefer to go all out or do something smaller and more intimate?